Wow…its been a while since I’ve written… and I have 10 other things that I should be doing. When does life ever slow down? I’m resolved to say that it probably won’t anytime soon, but I am, at the same time, probably addicted to the busyness. I wonder if I would know what to do with myself if given a week of nothingness (I realize this isn’t a word, but that’s okay with me).
Enough complaining…I just thought I would pen what I was thinking tonight. Sometimes, at random times, I am lonely….I am surrounded by people all day, but sometimes don’t get the chance to really connect with anyone because of busyness. I love all people and often try to find an avenue to connect with anybody I meet, but there are just some people that you really connect with… its just like something clicks when you first meet. These people turn into your best friends or maybe more, in some cases. Or maybe you don’t get a chance to know each other, but you know that you’d be best friends if you were given the opportunity. Anyway… I may be crazy… but today I didn’t really get a chance to see any of those people and maybe that’s why I’m a bit lonely.
And my second thought and perhaps one of more significance…is really just me writing down that I want to fix my eyes on Christ. There is so much in my life that is unsteady, not constant, faltering… I often lack direction and have to beg Christ to be my Vision. I sometimes feel like I should have more things in order…I should have a wedding ring on my finger, I should have a better direction for my future career, I should have the courage to tell someone of my love for them, I should have my summer planned out, I should have, I should have, I should have. I think I begin feeling this way when I take my vision away from Christ.
It’s easy to start looking around and seeing all the things the world gives and wanting them.. security, a certain relationship, a doctoral degree, pride, prestige. I want to look up to Christ. There’s a verse that literally brings me to tears every time I read it or even think about it. It is Jesus speaking in the Gospel according to John. He said… “I have come that they may have LIFE and have it to the full.” The word life there is a Greek word, but the Hebrew equivalent is used in the book of Ezekiel, where the Ezekiel stands in a valley of dry bones. The LORD asks him: “Can this dry bones come alive?” The word for “life and alive” is congruent. YES. Christ IS the life. I will look at Christ to be my Vision.